It’s not all about sex, it’s the attention, affection, companionship I crave. Yet, I always find myself in situations where the likelihood of something “more” is most likely not going to happen. I have no one to blame but myself and putting myself into these situations and with the admission of feelings almost always leads to rejection despite spilling my heart, my regrettable mistakes and how much those thing have hurt and hindered me. I am human, I make mistakes and often bad choices but those things shouldn’t be held against me when I try to show I am sincere. Those decisions I have made don’t define me. They don’t make up who I am, but those decisions are held over my head like a looming storm. I can smell the rain and know the storm is coming, but there is nothing I can do to stop it. How can we possibly move forward if the past is always brought up in the present?